Yesterday I went to the Rathayatra in Harrisburg, PA, with my son Caitanya, and it was my first time in kirtan with devotees since three years ago. It was a good time, and I was able to connect a little with a few devotees. Later, at night my legs were sore from dancing.
Lately I’ve been trying to get back into devotional service again, but I’m finding many obstacles that I will need to overcome. A major portion of this is figuring out how to get along with devotees, because I still feel that it was problems with devotees that pushed me out.
Another big issue I struggle [...]
Is it too much to ask for a spiritual leadership free from corruption? Apparently it is.
Last year I reported a violation of ISKCON Law 18.104.22.168.3.9, pertaining to Child Protection Concerns, which had occurred at Gita-nagari in 2005. The persons I identified as violating that law were Radhanatha, Malati, and Tamohara. In 2005, Tamohara [...]
My first upset as an initiated devotee was during my initiation ceremony. The chief desire that motivated me to seek initiation was that I hoped it would somehow help improve my chanting of the Hare Krsna mahamantra. I really wanted that, but it didn’t seem to happen. I also wanted to be accepted in the [...]
I seem to be in a very weird circumstance. The mean behavior of devotees made me quit aspiring for Krsna consciousness and try to believe that Krsna is imaginary, but associating with atheists renewed my faith in Krsna. I had been trying my best to serve devotees according to my duty, but the GBC contemptuously [...]
During my very recent two-year denial of Krsna consciousness, I was invited to a large community of atheists on Google+, presumably because I seemed like one. Oddly enough, it was about the time when I had become frustrated with atheistic reasoning (which seems to be thoroughly ignorant of Krsna conscious philosophy), so I turned out [...]
I never suspected I would feel this way, now after fifteen years of doing my best and trying really hard to live for pleasing Srila Prabhupada by participating in and promoting his movement. I was greatly inspired by a vision of Krsna that originally caused me to seek out devotees as purported to exist in [...]
I am considering whether to abandon this blog, perhaps to start another. I started this blog with the intention of documenting my happy advancement in Krishna consciousness, but instead it quickly turned into a chronology of outrage, grief, and disappointment in the Hare Krishna movement. I’ve had little good to say about it for the [...]
Recently Sita-pati Prabhu composed a blog entry addressing my strained relationship with ISKCON, and I appreciated what he wrote. ( http://www.atmayogi.com/node/3595 ) ?I realize that it must be a challenge for him dealing with the controversy I sometimes raise, which feeds to PlanetISKCON. I try to take that into consideration when I write, but [...]
Although I began this blog with the full intention of describing how wonderful is the process of advancing in devotional service from my perspective, many readers have remarked that it’s overly negative. In fact, the theme of this blog is in describing my journey, and I’ve stuck to that even though it’s not been nearly [...]